In her last post Breaking the fear barrier my girlfriend and mistress mentioned the 1 to 10 pain scale according to her understanding. I just wanted to share my thoughts on the pain scale we use.

First of all so far I’ve never used anything lower than 3 although hand spanking over jeans would have to be a 1 and they’re never serious so no need to apply the pain scale. If she’d asked me while delivering that caning I probably would have said 11. Anyway, that’s another story and we learned that day it’s important to at least finish a spanking on the bare so you can monitor the damage even though it will hurt more.

3: Typical hand spanking or paddle applied over pants. Can take a fair few of these but they’ll build up and work up the scale even though they’re all applied with the same force. I definitely feel them, but they feel like a massage. Good warm up. Also the flogger after a few minutes.

5: Tawse or strap. A good level of pain. The sort that sends me into subbie space.

7: This is what the large 16″ wooden paddle usually starts at when applied to my bare ass although I usually only get this for disciplinary spankings and no more than four at a time. Bit too intense for my liking but I’m not supposed to enjoy these sort of sessions. Of course, I still do – but for a different reason.

9: After the fourth with the plank mentioned above or the cane. A scale 9 impact will also propel me across the bed (assuming I’ve been bent over the end of the bed as is her favourite position for me) and leave me curled up fetal position under as many pillows as I can grab while in trajectory.

Also just want to mention I’ve put up just one pic for now of our spanking implements collection on the new toys and implements page with more to come, seeing flickr deleted our account.

Hi! Here’s my first blog entry. I’m “her”, otherwise known as Ms Vanialla Spankos.

I will write up some blog entries about how we got together, and about our fun and games during the past 2 months. I also plan to talk about my feelings, the inner struggles, and our combined efforts to make this BDSM thing work when we are in a romantic relationship as well. It has required effort and a lot of open and honest communication. But this has resulted in a wonderful caring and nurturing relationship that we have, filled with many hours of kinky fun. :)

But first… here’s the “office caning” from my perspective:

When he told me he was going to have his own office temporarily I immediately took the opportunity to tell him that one of my fantasies has always been to do stuff in someones office – by “stuff” I mean passionate vanilla sex. Neither of us yet brave enough for this sort of adventure, we talked about me visiting him in his office for a spanking. And so the day was set.

The evening before our scheduled session I sent him a text message, addressing him as subbie boy (to let him know his role had already begun) and told him to buy some wax strips on his way home. He replied “yes ma’am”, so I knew he got the picture. Later that evening I arrived at his place and told him that he had to wax my legs in preparation for tomorrows session, and that he also had to iron my shirt. On went his collar and he set about getting me ready.

This was the first time I had seriously taken a role of Domme outside a “session”. For the past two months I have been learning and growing and dealing with a part of me that hates to degrade or disrespect someone. Knowing full well I was doing neither, I was able to fully enjoy this extension to our session. I began to really enjoy setting the scene for the next day. He, however, seemed somewhat unused to me assuming Domme for such an extended time and twice went to use the computer without my permission. Consequently he received a short spanking with a steel enforced paddle, and there were some lighter reprimands thrown in for good measure.

So “the day” finally rolls around. He has gone to work and I get up and get dressed – a tight black business skirt which ends at my knees, a beautifully shaped white business shirt (not done up with buttons but rather the hooks you get on a corset) a black pinstriped jacket and black pumps (heels). I made an effort to wear makeup and pulled my hair back in a more business sort of way – like a french roll but with a clawed clip to hold it in place.

With nerves and excitement I ended up arriving 15 minutes early and SMSed him to tell him to come and collect me. He wrote back “sorry sorry sorry!!! still in a meeting”. “Very well then” I replied. Then I sent my final sms “1 for every 5 minutes late”. This was better than I could possibly plan! There he was, stuck in a work meeting, squirming in his seat thinking about me waiting impatiently and anticipating his punishment. Perfect!

Dressed so formally, which is unusual for me given I haven’t needed to dress so in quite awhile, I felt pretty self-conscious and nervous, but I didn’t want him to sense this. He left his meeting early and escorted me up to his office. Walking through the open working space full of his work colleagues was daunting. I felt so conspicuous like I was his girlfriend on show and like I had a sign on me saying “I’m here for kinky sh!t”. Relief flooded me when we made it to his office and he closed the door to the outside world. There he stood in his suit looking incredibly handsome and sexy. It was just me and him now. I knew how to handle that! ;)

The blinds which were the only barrier to protect us from public scrutiny were disconcertingly flimsy. There were gaps where I could see out and this seemed to unsettle the both of us.  I pushed him backwards up against the door but he felt people could see. I took our cane out from my bag and asked him what this punishment was for. He said he didn’t know. I reminded that I had instructed him to have a reason for me so added one to his tally. He said I owed him 7, so I added another 2 for being ten minutes late to collect me from reception.

We moved to his desk where I pushed him to bend over. I didn’t want to jump straight in so I rubbed his bum with my hand and then asked “so should we take your pants off?”. He freaked “Nooo!” and I fiddled with his belt and undid it, before laughing at his fear and saying I wasn’t going to remove them. I started the caning a little lightly but hit harder very quickly. I knew it hurt him a bit but he was trying to be quiet. Before I knew it I had delivered 9 hits. I wasn’t satisfied. I wanted to see evidence of his pain. I made him bend over again and I resumed his caining until he had squirmed a few times and made a few mumbled grunts. I stopped somewhere over double his due number – I had given up counting.

When he stood up he was red in the face and his eyes were watery. We hugged and kissed. It was so incredibly exciting. Then came a knock at the door. With a chair under the handle of the door, and the cane visible on his desk he said “NOOO”. We cracked up laughing – how embarrassing. I put the cane away and he moved his chair and we talked about how embarrassing but hilarious this was and what a good thing they hadn’t knocked earlier. When we left the office one of his colleagues, and a friend, kindly informed us that it had been him who had knocked and he had done so deliberately to distrub us.

I couldnt help but feel a sense of satisfaction. Until recently I don’t think I would have been brave enough to dress up and go into someones office like that. The confidence to play out ones fantasies is incredibly exhilerating and empowering. Whats more – I have struggled the past 2 months with hitting him. Being a caring empathic person its agaisnt every grain in my body to hurt someone. Though obviously not agaisnt EVERY grain as I had the motivation to overcome my tenderness. I am proud that I was able to give him a decent caning – this means I *AM* capable of giving him what he wants and needs! My initial fears of not keeping up, or not being good enough, or just simply not being enough for him have finally dissipated completely.

What a way to celebrate our 2 months togther!

She raised the idea with me a few days ago about paying me a visit at my office for a disciplinary session. Sounded pretty kinky and exciting so I said I’d like that. So I’m in a meeting and I get a text message instructing me to come and collect her from the office reception – but I was in a meeting! I replied and told Her I’d be a few minutes late. 1 for every 5 minutes She responds. Damn. I end up leaving before the end of the meeting to save my arse from further torment provoked by the mindless monologue of people in the meeting who seemingly had nothing better to be doing and didn’t care about holding people back after the scheduled meeting time. Tell you what, those sort of people are the ones who really need the spanking!

So I go and escort Her from reception to my office, nervous as hell – there are people everywhere, people I work with, and all that’s separating me and what I’m about to have done to me and them is some flimsy barely adequate internal window blinds and very thin walls either side. I propped a chair under the door handle just in case someone decided to walk straight in without knocking.

So what am I getting the cane for? Well I put forward a previous tally of seven yet to be taken care of – but that’s not good enough a reason, so She adds another one. And then two more for being late to escort Her to my office. Over the desk I go, luckily getting to keep my pants on – although She teases me by starting to take my pants down. As if I’m not nervous enough as it is doing this in my office!

I don’t think She can count because although I was distracted by the rather intense pain of the cane I think I ended up receiving twenty two stroke with the cane. Keep in mind that we’re only two months into this relationship, and not only that but two months into any sort of serious BDSM/spanking play – so my bum isn’t at all conditioned for pain and I have to admit they were rather mild strokes, but eight hours later I had a nice small red and blue bruise on my right cheek where she was concentrating the strokes and the morning after it still hurts to sit down. A “loving” reminder of Her that I will have with me for the rest of today also.

Hopefully having the bruise, while minor, will preclude me from having to participate (as sub obviously) in the local BDSM play party that’s coming up in a few days – though I doubt it.

Also the cane used was a CANE-IAC Delrin Ever Ready 18″ OTK cane.